I’ve made her my fantasy.. this is not healthy is it?
This girl I know. She’s half German, and half Chinese/ Burmese. I’ve watched this girl for a year quietly. I saw her first about a year ago at the gym when I was in a long term relationship and we were having problems, I would never cheat so I just said to myself “too bad” and tried to move on but I kept thinking about her (not too much just sort of remembered her) She became my secret fantasy where I knew it was never possible but fun to think about. Then my fiance and I broke up and I couldn’t find this girl. I went to the same gym in summer, beginning of semester and didn’t see her. I figured she’d quit her job there so I decided to move on.. met another girl and one month after we hooked up, I saw the gym girl again out of nowhere on campus. So, once again I kicked myself and cursed my luck. I really liked the girl I was seeing so I once again told myself “too bad” but then I decided to go to gym (not for her, just to stay in shape) semester went on and ended, winter break she came back to the gym. I got to see her a lot, like twice a week in the past few months, talked a little, flirted a little. I told her friend I was interested and asked her friend if she was single. I couldn’t ask myself. Turned out she has a boyfriend. So I can’t do anything- more importantly I don’t want to do anything. Last thing I hope for is to break up a happy couple and move in.
This girl has everything I want in a girl. Physically she is very skinny, small boobs, attractive face, a little bit on the tan side, and eyes that just draw you in. That’s just appearance. Her personality and habits are exactly what I’ve imagined in a fantasy but never thought was realistic. I mean she is charming, always smiling, independent, athletic, and cheerful. She seems like a straight shooter, not into playing mind games.
We used to look at each other and smile and flirt all the time.., now she gives me this look that just says exactly the same sentiment I felt when I first saw her and was in a relationship “too bad, would’ve been an epic love. sorry” That’s how I know she is a woman of strong morals and wouldn’t be able to justify leaving someone for someone new in her mind very easily. I couldn’t when I first saw her. That’s how I know she and I think alike.
Here’s the problem-
I know she’s with someone else and I have no expectations. I just can’t move onto anything else. I’m having a hard time meeting other girls. I meet a girl, think about it and compare her to Melissa and think to myself, why should I settle for someone who’s not what I want. Like last Saturday, we went to a cigar bar/ drinking, met a girl there talked to her for 10 minutes, got her facebook, phone number, etc.. she went away for a few minutes so I checked her profile on facebook and saw her pics, they are all beautiful but there are like 5000 of them. I thought to myself I don’t want to waste my time with someone so superficial and all high and mighty. Melissa’s not like this at all. I asked my friend if he liked her, he said yea so I when she came back, I told her one of my friends thought she was cute and got them introduced.
Another girl at the gym, not as pretty but pretty good looking.. I caught her eye when she was on her treadmill but never talked to her because if did then Melissa would have seen me with her and it would have meant door’s closed 🙁
I’m not used to not getting something that I’ve wanted this strongly and so I’m having a real hard time with this. I can’t get this girl out of my mind. I don’t know what to do?
Dean Cortez answers:
I seriously want to say that all you need is a cold shower but … I’ve been in that position before so I know what it feels like … All I can say is distance yourself away from her. If you’re sure that she’s happy with her boyfriend and that her boyfriend is treating her well then the best thing that you can do is just move out of the picture. First thing you have to do is to move out to another gym, next get yourself busy with other activities like studies or work, and finally when you date someone stop comparing the girl to Melissa and just see if you like the girl or not (based on your own preferences). That said the only way to really move on is if you seriously want to move on and to not get addicted to the feeling of infatuation (and trust me the way that you talk about Melissa … It’s just infatuation)
I’m a Filipino! I need your opinion!!?
I’m a Filipino. I’m in 7th Grade.
All the girls in my grade think I am popular, and beautiful.
All the guys think I am hot/cute/pretty.
They say I have a great personality. I don’t! Listen to this … I’m a cheerleader, who loves to play football – I want to be the first in the superbowl, as a girl. I want to be wide receiver, if it ever happens. I umm love helping my friends, and I would do anything in the universe to make them smile. I love to talk. I love love love sports, I like to skateboard also, I eat…a lot. I like Chinese and Filipino foods. And I’m going to stop there before you explode XD
I’m trying to get your opinion if you think I am or not. Go ahead and tell me. I won’t mind if you say I’m ugly!
I keep telling every single person that I’m not. I’m short, got a flat nose. fat, chubby, and I just hate it. I would trade anybody for anything.
Th4nKs FoR sToPPinG To HeLp Me!!! 🙂
(I’ve got pics –
www.myspace.com/sk8terchick718 –> go to pics –> click any album (or all) haha –> and tell me what you think.
Dean Cortez answers:
You look adorable, you remind me of an old friend. However your extremely immature.
Your only in 7th grade though, so you’ll change in high school. All’s well.
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